Study Says Letting Baby “Cry It Out” Isn’t Harmful
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Baby’s been up two times already tonight, and there she goes again. You consider letting her cry it out, but then you wonder, “Will she be scarred forever?” A new study from the AAP says no — that letting baby cry every now and then won’t hurt her emotionally or ruin your relationship with her.
After a 2005 Infant Sleep Study suggested the cry-it-out method wouldn’t benefit children, a second study was conducted to see how sleep interventions — or lack thereof — affect children’s emotions and behaviors in the long run. During the five year follow up, known as the Kid Sleep Study, researchers evaluated the emotional health of 255 children from the original study.
When the children turned six, researchers conducted a 60-minute home-based observation of each child’s lifestyle. Afterwards, they distributed the Pediatric Quality of Life Inventory and took post-sleep samples of cortisol (a hormone released as a response to stress) for further evaluation. All of these assessments were used to determine the child’s emotional state and the quality of their child-parent relationships.
In the end, researchers found no difference in emotional health or in parental relationships between children who received sleep intervention and those who were left to cry.
So should you do the “cry-it-out” technique or not? Unfortunately, there’s no right answer that works for every parent. As with most parenting styles, you have to go with what feels right to you.
Did you ever let your baby cry it out? Why or why not?
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Lol. Nooooo!!!!!!!!
No way! You could show me 100 different studies saying it isn’t harmful, I still won’t let my LO “cry it out”.
Can’t do it….tried once made it 20 minutes haha Husband had two bawling girls on his hands! She has to sleep all night eventually, right? Maybe when she is 5 *sigh*
No kidding! My 18-month-old still wakes up and most nights for at least 1-2 hours. She is more nervous about noises than my son ever was. Cry it out doesn’t work with her-she will literally not stop. Poor thing. One day they will figure it out, or be old enough to occupy themselves in their room while we get sleep-hopefully!
Oh the CIO battle!! I just can’t do it! When my little one cries it stresses me out. When I’m on the freeway and she cries it sends me into an instant stress attack. I tried once in the middle of the night. We lasted 3 minutes and I was screaming at my partner and in tears myself. Oh well, I’ll sleep again…someday…like when I’m 32 perhaps
its okay…I love all our nighttime snuggle time
I think the key here is the phrase: “every now and then” in the first paragraph-as in it is NOT good to always let your child cry and reinforce to them that you will not attend to them EVER when they are upset…we can probably all agree that that would not be productive parenting. Some children just need reinforcement through the night that you are still there and the boogey man does not exist. Life with kids can not EVER be summed up with quick, easy solutions-at least not with my two children. The idea that all children of the same age sleep the same way is absurd anyway.
This study doesn’t show the ages in where it isn’t harmful to let your child cry it out. There’s a huge difference in letting a 2 week old cry it out then a 16 month old. I believe 100% that letting a 2 week old will cause harmful effects to his/ her emotional well being. With that being said, I do not let babies cry it out. I would, however, let a tantruming 2 year old cry it out.
VERY important point! Knowing your child is so important.
We let our 11 month old daughter fuss when she wakes up at night. 99% of the time she whines for a couple of minutes then goes right back to sleep. If she wakes up and is screaming and escalating then obviously it’s a different story and something is wrong. And she has been sleeping through the night since age 6 weeks. She has learned to self sooth.
Okay, so CIO is NOT for everyone and it’s the hardest thing a mother will ever have to do. However, not all babies can be soothed via rocking, etc. My daughter suffers from Tactile Defensiveness and is very sensitive to touch. A kiss feels like 1000 bugs crawling up your body. It’s terrible! Moms can say they will never CIO. Well, live in my shoes for a day and you will see differently. I can’t rock my daughter to sleep. I can’t soothe her via rubbing her back. It’s so tough. My daughter was up every hour and took 3 15min naps until about 8mos! I was frazzled. I hadn’t slept longer than 2hrs since I was 34wks pregnant. We have a pediatrician who is very against CIO and I walked into his office at her 9mo appointment. He said, “You have to let her CIO.” We did and after a week she was sleeping 10-12hrs and taking 2 2-3hr naps. We tried everything! She is the most anti-cuddly baby ever. She hated being held for more than 5min at a time. Not to mention, when she was crying I’d go in her room and she would instantly stop crying and start laughing, much like she was playing me. IF anyone does CIO, it will be hardd. Turn off the monitor and have a glass of wine. For some people, going in every 5-10min helps. For us, it made my daughter much more upset. Even now, at almost two, she STILL fights sleep. Her father was a terrible sleeper as well. I feel many sleep issues are genetic. Don’t judge me because I let my daughter CIO! It made a happier mama which in turn made a happier baby. Not to mention, we are still extremely close. I hate hearing her cry but for some (a rare few), CIO really is the only option! ♥
I just don’t understand how a 60 minute home observation can actually determine anything.
Very good point!
They don’t even mention PHYSICAL harm that can be done – raised levels of cortisol for extended periods of time and/or often throughout the day or night can harm babies BRAINS. I’m not messing with that. I will comfort my baby no matter what time of day or night and no matter how often – it’s my instinct as a parent and it’s the baby’s right as a defenseless child who depends solely on me. I did this with my son who sleeps awesomely for 10-11 hours each night at 5 years old, and my daughter who is 2.5 and wakes once to come into our bed and falls right back to sleep for the rest of the night. My husband and I cherish those middle of the night and/or morning toddler snuggles that we know will be gone all too soon.
Just to be clear, this study did NOT advocate just letting babies cry by themselves until they fell asleep.
It found that the specific technique of controlled crying (which is NOT just letting the baby cry until it falls asleep) at 6 months of age or older, did not do long term harm.
Details matter.
They really need to include a link to the actual survey for us so that we can read it on our own. I do agree with you that using Ferber, for example, AFTER liquid nutrition is completed (i.e. breast or bottle) is ok because there is repeated and gradually extended periods of crying.