5 Places I Never (Ever!) Thought I’d Clean So Much Until I Had Baby

Photo: Positive Psychology News / The Bump
Photo: Positive Psychology News / The Bump

Okay, I knew I had to bathe my child, change poopy diapers and wipe snotty noses, but there were a few surprises along the way in these first few months. So, hold on to your lunches because these are all the places I’ve had to clean up since baby arrived:

1. Lint

It’s everywhere! Under their nails, between their fingers and toes, and even in their itty bitty belly buttons! And I don’t mean dry lint, I mean soggy, foul-smelling, peel from the skin gobs of it!

2. Earwax

I knew this was coming, but boy, was I surprised at the amount. Carrots, this aint no green house, this is the produce aisle!

3. Bogies/Boogers 

Shockingly large quantities of snot! Whether you suction it out or are experiencing the joys of having it wiped on your shoulder whilst baby wearing.

4. Bottoms

4. That little dip at the top of the butt, you know it, the cleftal horizon – You’ve wiped all over, you survey your work and it looks good… then you look at that tiny 1/2″ area, that little dip that hides the diaper cream, the poop and the fluff!

And last, but by no means least…

5. Neck Cheese

The no neck monsters accumulate something the finest cheese experts may turn their noses up to in those folds! Dried milk, sweat and more lint! You’ll clean it, but that smell will linger in your nostrils all day. And when you least expect it, nuzzling into the neck of your LO during a cuddle session, there it will be!

It’s not all bad though, it gives you another reason to enjoy the bonding of bath time, cleaning those little fingers and toes is a joy!

Plus, more from The Bump:

10 Totally Weird (But Totally Normal) Things About Your Newborn

New Mom Survival Guide

Baby Skincare 101