Before we go any further, let’s get one thing straight: I am not a Kardashian fan. I’ve never watched any of their shows. I still don’t quite understand how or why they are famous. But they have permeated popular culture and now I find myself in the unlikeliest of places: defending Kim Kardashian.

Did I really just write those words?

I sure did. Because I am horrified by the media coverage of her pregnancy weight gain.

Now, no one has benefited more from her fame and celebrity than Ms. Kim, a longtime tabloid target, so it is not too surprising that the media has been all over her the moment she announced her pregnancy. But when did it become acceptable to pick on an expecting mother and call her “fat”?

We’ve all been in there — that awkward period before the baby bump has announced itself as a baby bump and not just a really big lunch. We’ve all felt awkward, uncomfortable and hormonal. Now imagine going through that in the public eye, with tabloids and news outlets scrutinizing every ounce of your body and speculating on your weight gain? I can’t imagine what it must be like to see yourself on cover after cover next to headlines like, “Don’t Call Me Fat!” (US Weekly), “I Can’t Stop Eating!” (In Touch Weekly) and “Pregnant Kim’s Nightmare” (Star magazine, referring to her unlikely 65-lb weight gain). Star even took it one step further, comparing a photo of her in a black and white dress to an image of Shamu the killer whale.

Wow. Really? Um, tabloids, in case you haven’t heard, you’re supposed to gain weight when you’re carrying another human being around inside of you — whether you’re a celebrity like Kim or an average mom like me, who gained more than 60 lbs during her first pregnancy.

I admit, there were definitely times that I felt self-conscious about my size, especially in my third trimester when people asked if I was having twins, and I wasn’t a big fan of my “cankles.” But my pregnancy weight gain was a subject reserved for only three audiences: my obstetrician, my husband and my girlfriends. It was not fodder for late night television or used as a marketing ploy to sell magazines.

So this is why I feel an unexpected pang of sympathy for Kim Kardashian because, celebrity or not, no one deserves to have cruel and nasty things written about their body ­– especially during such a beautiful and special time as pregnancy. The intense scrutiny and obsession with her weight gain is bordering on bullying, and sends a terrible message to all women that the pregnant body is something to be ashamed of.  We already feel the pressure to squeeze back into our skinny jeans weeks after giving birth. Now we’re not even allowed to gain a healthy amount of weight when we’re expecting? Geez, what’s next?

Do you think it’s fair to judge Kim for her weight gain?

Plus, more from The Bump:

What to Eat During Your Pregnancy

5 Ways to Keep Your Pregnancy Weight Gain Within Reason

Will My Body Be the Same After Baby?

A good friend of mine recently welcomed her third baby. When I stopped by to meet that little bundle, she showed me some gorgeous photos a photographer friend of hers had taken the previous month to capture the last few weeks of her pregnancy. My friend looked beautiful, peaceful, serene. So maternal.

As I thumbed through the photo album, it struck me that I hardly have any photos of me during either pregnancy. I didn’t take weekly progress photos. There are no silly candids where I playfully showed off my bump. I don’t have any intimate maternal portraits, my hands resting gently on top of my belly as I looked down and smiled. Really, aside from the obligatory baby shower photos, and one last minute pic of my husband, son and I the night before my daughter was born, neither pregnancy was well documented.

Without really realizing it, I had shied away from the camera when I was pregnant. With my son, I’m sure it’s because I gained a whopping 70 lbs during my pregnancy and was very self-conscious and embarrassed about how I looked, as vain as that sounds. I didn’t feel radiant or glowing. Instead, I felt swollen, enormous, tired and completely and utterly uncomfortable. The last thing I wanted to do at that time was pose in front of a camera and have that image recorded for posterity. And this was in the days before Facebook.

Even though I gained far less with my daughter, and physically felt much better, the idea of posing for maternity portraits simply never occurred to me. And now I feel a pang of regret.

I’m not planning on having any more children, so I know I missed my opportunity. Pregnancy is one of the most special and meaningful times in our lives, and it goes by in a flash. I wish I’d had the confidence back then to embrace my pregnant body, ignoring that little voice in the back of my head warning me about my double chin and cankles. I wish I could share some pictures with my children of what I looked like — really looked like — when they were in my tummy. I wish I had the photographic evidence that could show them just how much love I felt for them, even before I had laid eyes on them.

My mom has one photo from when she was pregnant with me: her face lit up in a beautiful smile as she cradled her belly, and I used to love looking at it as a little girl, imagining me all curled up inside her. Photos have the power to trigger feelings, memories and emotions. They can help you remember.

As I get older, the memories of walking around with these amazing little people growing inside of me will fade. How wonderful would it have been to have captured those precious moments by documenting – and celebrating – my big, beautiful belly and how it changed my life forever?

Did you have pregnancy portraits?

Plus, more from The Bump:

Your Pregnancy Week by Week

Keeping a Pregnancy Journal

Birthday Cake Ideas for Tots

No matter what theme you’re going for, one rule reigns when it comes to baby shower: Dessert. Over. Everything. It doesn’t matter if the food was prepared by Wolfgang Puck and you’ve got Mario Batali whipping up some festive appetizers in the kitchen. No, when it comes time for the after dinner treat, dessert is first.

And while taste matters, decor does too! This bright, festive and totally Hawaiian themed dessert display shows off how a little bit of planning, decor and design can make your dessert table the must-see of the party! Get inspired (and hungry!) with this breezy and cool display:

Plus, more from The Bump:

Baby Shower Spotlight: A Wonderfully Woodland Inspired Fete!

Built a Creative (and Cool!) Candy Display at Your Shower

A Gorgeously Green Gender Surprise Shower!