A friend of mine just had a baby. Her third. You might think at my age and stage, when just about everyone I know has had at least one or two kids, that the new-baby excitement may have worn off. Not so. I waited breathlessly for my friend’s Facebook updates, checked email and voicemail, eagerly awaiting the news. Would it be another girl, as expected? What would they name her? When would they send out a picture?

One of the cool things about babies, in my opinion, is that they are the great equalizer. I’ve seen big, burly construction-worker types go all googly in the presence of a baby. I’ve seen too-cool-for-school teenagers, grumpy old ladies, and buttoned-up businessmen go gaga for babies. How can you look at a tiny bundle of cuteness and not melt a little?

One of the funniest things I’ve ever seen is when my own three-year-old son, who is more a rough-and-tumble kid than the sentimental type, was saying good-bye to some friends of ours who’d stopped by with their two-year-old son and new daughter. The toddler boys played with trucks the whole time and seemed oblivious of the newborn. But then my son shouted out the door as they were leaving, “Bye! I like your baby!”

People often assume that because I go cuckoo for cutie-pies, I must want another baby of my own. That is not the case. The two kids I’ve got are plenty, thanks. I will hold your baby till the cows come home, rock her, snuggle him, sniff that fuzzy little head, but I have no problem handing them back and going home for a full night of uninterrupted sleep. I’m done with midnight feedings, colic, spit-up, teething — diapers, even! No going back now. But that doesn’t keep me from being thrilled when someone else is having another one. Mazel tov!

Though little ones do grow up fast, as any mom ever has been told a thousand times, the excitement of welcoming a new person into the world never gets old. Now pass me your baby, would you?

Do you know how many kids you want to have?

As the primary meal-maker in my family, I love meals that are easy to prepare. Meals that are time-consuming to prepare usually only get made on the weekends. Weeknights are for easy meals! Today, I’ll share some of my go-to favorites. Maybe they’ll suit your family as well!

The big thing that I like about many of these meals is that they have plenty of vegetables in them, so it cuts down on the number of side dishes I’ll make!

Meal Idea #1: Chicken Tacos (from Budget Savvy Diva)

Serves: 4-6

Tip: Since this recipe doesn’t take all day to cook, it’s a good one to make on a Sunday afternoon, pack away in the refrigerator and just reheat the meat for a quick weeknight meal.

Ingredients:
1.5 – 2 pounds of skinless chicken breast – frozen or thawed
1 packet of taco seasoning (or you can make your own)
1 can (10) ounces of Rotel
Taco stuff — tortillas, lettuce, cheese, sour cream, whatever your family likes.

Directions:
1. Set your crock pot to low and place taco seasoning, chicken and Rotel together. Mix.
2. If chicken is frozen, it will take about six hours. If it was already thawed, it will be done in 3-4.
3. Take two forks and pull apart the chicken and mix it into the awesome juices.
4. If there’s not enough liquid, add a little chicken stock.
5. Serve on tortillas and add the toppings of your choice.

Meal Idea #2: Chicken Alfredo Bake

Serves: 4

Tip: The hardest part of this meal is the prep work — you have 3 pots going with pasta, veggies and chicken. If you had time the night before, you could steam the veggies, cook the chicken and boil the pasta and assemble it together. The day you want to serve it, just pop it in the oven when you come home from work. 30 minutes later, you’ll have a great meal!

Ingredients:
1/2 pound chicken, cooked, cut into bite-sized pieces
1 bag California mix frozen veggies (broccoli, cauliflower, carrots)
1 jar Alfredo sauce
8 ounces mozzerella cheese
8 ounces bow tie pasta
Garlic powder

Directions:
1. Boil pasta noodles until al dente.  Steam veggies according to the package.
2. Cut chicken into bite-size pieces and brown chicken with some garlic powder.
3. Once pasta is done, drain.
4. In an 8×8 or 9×9 inch dish, combine chicken, alfredo, veggies together.
5. Top with mozzarella cheese.
6. Bake at 350 until cheese is brown for about 30 minutes.

Meal Idea #3: Jambalaya (from Pennies On A Platter)

Serves: 4 (easily)

Tip: To make this easier, when I’m preparing one of them, I really prepare two or three of them. While I have the rice and spices out, it’s easy to measure them one or two more times and store them in a baggie until next time. Also, if you brown chicken for another recipe, just brown a little more and store in the frig until you’re ready to make this. Brown once — make two meals!

If you’re making this for little ones and are afraid it will be too spicy, just omit the cayenne pepper — this dish can pack a punch!

Ingredients:
1 cup long-grain white rice
3 Tablespoons dried minced onion
1 Tablespoon dried parsley flakes
1 Tablespoon beef bouillon granules
1/2 teaspoon each of dried thyme, garlic powder, black pepper
1/4 teaspoon each of cayenne pepper and salt
1 bay leaf
2 1/2 cups water
1 can (14.5 oz) diced tomatoes
1 can (8 oz) tomato sauce
1/2 pound fully cooked smoked sausage, such as andouille, cut into 1/4-inch slices
1/2 pound chicken

Directions:
1. In a medium bowl or canister, combine the rice, onion, parsley, bouillon, thyme, garlic powder, black pepper, cayenne pepper, salt and bay leaf. Stir to fully mix. (This mixture can be stored in an airtight container for up to 6 months.)

2. In a Dutch oven or a large heavy-bottom saucepan, combine the rice mixture with the rest of the ingredients. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat, then reduce to a simmer. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the rice is tender, about 20 to 25 minutes.

3. Discard the bay leaf and serve while hot.

Meal Idea #4: Saucy Chicken Broccoli Bake (from Tammy’s Recipes)

Serves: 8

Tip: If you make any other dishes that use rice during the week, make twice the amount and just reheat the rice for this meal. This actually makes quite a bit, so I’ll often half the recipe, but this also makes wonderful leftovers!

Ingredients:
16 ounces frozen broccoli florets (or about 3 cups fresh broccoli florets)
3 cups cooked cubed chicken
pepper
2 cans cream of chicken soup
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1 teaspoon curry powder
1/2 cup chicken broth
paprika, optional
2 cups (8 ounces) shredded cheddar cheese
1 1/2 cups rice (uncooked measurement), cooked according to package instructions (should make 4 1/5 cups of cooked rice)

Instructions:
1. In covered saucepan, cook broccoli in water just until tender, about 5 minutes.

2. In greased 9 x 13 baking dish, spread broccoli across bottom and sprinkle chicken evenly on top. Generously sprinkle black pepper over chicken.

3. In mixing bowl, combine cream soups, mayonnaise, curry powder, and chicken broth, whisking until smooth. Pour over chicken. Sprinkle paprika on top if desired.

4. Bake uncovered at 375 degrees for 20-30 minutes or until hot and bubbly. Spread cheese on top and bake 5-10 minutes longer, until melted and slightly browned.

5. While casserole is baking, cook rice. Serve the chicken and broccoli mixture over hot rice.

Meal Idea #5: Creamy Chicken Pockets (from Pennies on A Platter)

Tip: This is another one that you can make most of it the night before. Just brown the chicken (or use some that you had leftover from some other meals!) and combine the ingredients to make the insides of the pockets. When you’re ready to make the meal, spread out the crescent rolls, stuff them, and bake them! I leave the breadcrumbs off the top of them just to make it even easier.

Ingredients:

2 tbsp olive oil
2-3 small chicken breasts, diced
1/2 cup minced onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 tablespoon butter, softened
3 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/4 teaspoon seasoned salt
2 tablespoons milk
1 (8 ounce) package refrigerated crescent rolls
1 tablespoon butter, melted
1/4 cup Italian seasoned bread crumbs, optional

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 375˚F.

2. Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook the chicken with the onions and garlic.

3. Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, beat the cream cheese and 1 tablespoon softened butter until smooth. Stir in the cooked chicken, onions and garlic. Add the salts, pepper and milk. Mix well.

4. Separate the crescent roll dough into the eight triangles. Dollop a tablespoon of filling into the center of each triangle and fold the corners up to seal. Press and seal firmly. Place on ungreased baking sheet or stone and repeat with the remaining dough and filling.

5. (optional) Brush the tops with the melted butter and sprinkle with the bread crumbs.

6. Bake for 11 – 13 minutes, or until golden brown.

To heat up leftovers, bake in a preheated 350˚F oven for 10 minutes.

What are your favorite, easy weeknight meals?

“Oh no, they did not just say that out loud!” said my shocked husband as I read to him from the new book Sh*tty Mom, a totally hilarious and uncensored look at some of the impossible situations we mothers find ourselves in.  We’re not talking about just the run of the mill breast milk stains and poop explosions here. For example, there are chapters called “Organized Sports Might Be Great for the Kids, but They Suck for You” and “He Wants Sex, You Want to Sew Your Legs Shut for Ten Years.”

Moms, it’s either laugh or cry sometimes, and authors Laurie Kilmartin, Karen Moline, Alicia Ybarbo and Mary Ann Zoellner choose to laugh. What a relief from all the fretting and over analyzing I’m always doing about my mama job!

How do you know if you’re a Sh*tty Mom? Answer these questions:

Did you hate kids before you had one?

Do you hate them even more now (except yours?)

When people say, “Being a mom is so exhausting,” do you think, “Not the way I do it”?

Are you willing to sacrifice some of your child’s happiness so you can sleep for another hour?

Do you ignore any pediatrician’s orders that you don’t agree with?

Does your kid have to have a fever above 100 degrees before you’ll keep him home?

If your kid does have a 100-degree fever, do you debate raising the “keep him home” fever ceiling to 101 degrees?

If you accept the premise that there are two kinds of moms at the park, “Plays with Her Children Mom” and “Texts from the Bench Mom,” then are you the latter?

If you had to choose a babysitter who:

a)      Plays with your children but arrives late

b)      Ignores your children but arrives on time, would you choose b? (No fair saying you’d make “a” come early.)

Did becoming a mom make you realize that your own mother was worse than you thought?

If you answered yes to three or more questions, you are a Sh*tty Mom.  

Let’s face it, we’ve all had Sh*tty Mom moments. Like the time I read the weather report for NY by accident and sent my LA kids to school in long sleeves and pants on a 90 degree day. Or the time I gave my daughter a piece of chocolate to get her to stop crying while I was on the phone. Or how about the time I really acted my age and in retaliation threw all my son’s DVDs in the pool he had just chucked my cell phone in? Unfortunately, I could go on and on.

If you’re ready to laugh and embrace your imperfectly perfect self in “the parenting guide for the rest of us,” you can find a copy here.

Are you a Sh*tty Mom? What’s your Sh*tty Mom moment confession?

Plus, more from The Bump:

You Know You’re a Mom When…

Before I Had Kids, I Swore I’d Never…

Craziest Things New Moms Did

New moms always hear their friends with older kids say “enjoy the time now, they grow up so fast.” I always thought that was total BS, because how could those moms wish for what I had – two little insatiable people who needed something from me all the time, no privacy, a slow insanity from lack of sleep, entire days with conversations using less than two syllable words, and situations that would outdo any “what’s grosser than gross” joke? I never thought I would make it to the point of that relaxed mom who at the park just watches their kids play while reading a book.

I wished, just wished they would grow up and stop making so many messes, scenes, and demands.

And then they did.

They walked themselves to school this morning for the first time. I should have been celebrating, for haven’t I complained about doing that task a million times over the last 9 years? And isn’t it my job to encourage them to rely on themselves and not me? Instead, unexpectedly, the emptiness and pain of not being needed anymore by them completely overtook me. Through tears I watched their backpacked bodies vanish around the corner, and I sadly whispered – “wait for me. wait for me.”

From now on, I’ll watch what I wish for.

Plus, more from The Bump:

10 Things to do for You in 10 Minutes

You Know You’re a Mom When…

Staying Sane Tips for New Moms

When my first child was born (after a grueling 36 hour labor) – he and I were an exhausted, overwhelmed, high strung, nervous mess. I had every intention of breastfeeding, but I had no idea how hard it would be. I latched him on over and over and as he fought me, we’d both just sob. I tried nipple shields, a lactation consultant, and after about two weeks I had an emotional and physical breakdown and switched to formula. It was insanely difficult to let go of that ideal while feeling the pressure from moms around me. I wish I could say changing to formula made things so much easier, but it didn’t. My son had a huge case of The Colic and we both were pretty miserable for six months as we tried different formulas to find one that his tummy could handle.

I was scared to have a second baby after that first experience but worked up the courage to go for it. When my daughter arrived, I wanted to try breastfeeding again. I was (way) more relaxed that time around but it still took 5 full days for my milk to come in. I used little droplets of formula to supplement while I latched her often and pumped to stimulate production. And then a moment I’ll never forget, while a lactation consultant was on the phone with me, I heard suck, and swallow! I was feeding my baby with my own body!! I went on to breastfeed exclusively for 6 months after that. Interestingly, overall, she was a much easier/happy baby. At 6 she’s also healthy, smart, and rarely sick.

So what does this all mean? Did breastfeeding make my daughter an easier baby? I don’t think so. My son is 9 now (he’s also healthy, advanced in school, and rarely sick). He’s still a pretty intense kid, too. I’m not convinced had we breastfed things would have turned out much differently. But do I wish I could go back and try it again with a new relaxed, accepting attitude? Absolutely.

Plus, more from The Bump

Mark Your Calendars, August 15 is Public Display of Breastfeeding Day

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Must Watch: Real Mom Breastfeeding in Public Tips

So you got your BFP (congrats!) and you now have nine exciting, but long months ahead of you. For dealing with those more unpleasant pregnancy symptoms, Bumpies on our message boards swear by the items in this Pregnancy Survival Kit for making the nine months a little more comfortable.

Any must-have products we forgot to include? Share them in the comments!

Need more pregnancy advice? Join your Birth Month Club or ask your questions to new moms who have been there on our Babies 0-3 Months message board.

Plus, more from The Bump:

Why We Get Crazy Pregnancy Cravings

The Worst Things to Say To a Pregnant Woman

Shocking Things That Can Happen During Pregnancy

Last week my husband went out of town for work (the nerve), and he took all sanity and order with him. Here’s a diary of how the week went, and what I learned about the parent I am and the parent I’m not (but need to be).

Day one: I have this image it will be fun to do a sleepover with the kids in my bed. Fun! Ha! They party in my bed until I finally, after, like 17 warnings, kick them out at 10pm. Yelling and crying (from all three of us) ensues. Not a good start.

Day two: Daughter wakes up with a hoarse voice from crying so much the night before, just before she is to narrate the year’s most important play at school. But with my magic warm honey water elixir and encouragement, she pulls through! So proud and relieved, I cry (again).

Day three: Worrying about things going wrong and breaking while genius, engineer husband is away. Dear friend delivers an anxiety-busting blended mocha to my door, like a fairy godmother. I’m so exhausted from long day at work and keeping up with chores alone that I crash in bed before the kids fall asleep…at midnight.

Day four: Serve macaroni and cheese in the pot it was cooked in, with three plastic forks for dinner, and we eat it on the floor picnic style. Kids think I’m the best parent ever, but I harbor guilt over not serving a single veggie even though I’m usually the veggie-pusher of the house. Sane husband not here to talk me out of guilt.

Day five: Have epiphany when I realize as parents, my husband and I have our good cop/bad cop roles down to a science, and I’m struggling because I have to be both cops when I (thankfully) so rarely have to be. Vow to get in touch with my inner mean mom.

Day six: Practice using a new “do as I say or else” voice today when the kids are incessantly fighting. It works! I can do this!

Day seven: Get over my pride and call a babysitter to help me out for a couple of hours so I can go to the grocery store in peace. Feel slightly ridiculous paying a sitter for this but relish the time on my own and push the cart extra slowly down each aisle.

Last week taught me that while disciplining is not my strong point (I’m the one kids go to for affection, advice and healing their physical and mental owies), I can and will do better to be a more well rounded parent. I don’t regret the mac and cheese picnic, though.

One of our sisters at The Blush recently discovered how great baby products can be for adults. I don’t have much time to stock up on personal beauty products, so I’ve reached for the kids’ Burt’s Bees lotion or California Baby body wash in a pinch plenty of times. I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how well they’ve worked for me too! Now when we travel I can just pack one set of shampoo/conditioner (my fave is the Circle of Friends line). Using them not only makes my hair easy to comb but I come out smelling like bananas, how great is that?!

You’d also be surprised with all the ways Lansinoh nipple cream can come in handy. Another time, perhaps.

Plus, more from The Bump

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Postbaby Skin and Hair Issues

I came across a post by Liz over at Mom-101 about the myth of “doing it all”, and with the demands of all the roles I play: mom, wife, employee, daughter, friend, neighbor, Girl Scout leader, football team mom, I often get the same question as Liz: “How do you do it?” If I’ve ever given the impression that I have things under control, I apologize! There is no one super mom who can handle everything with 100% thoroughness, and anyone who acts like they do (and makes the rest of us feel like crap) has a scary closet somewhere, I promise.

Here’s my liberating list of what I don’t do and what I choose to do instead:

I don’t do it all, but I do a whole lot. And for me, I’m there for what matters most.

What things do you not do to make room for the most important stuff?

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How Often Other Moms Have Sex

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